Thursday, April 17, 2008

Owning the interaction

I've got a new favorite move in sets: owning the interaction. Here is the example...

Girl: I know a lot about movies.
BB: I'll bet I would destroy you. I've seen a shit load of movies.
Girl: That's because I have a life.
BB: Do you do the double feature, where you see one movie then sneak into another?
Girl: NO! I'm too scared.

See it? Let's do another one.

BB: Do drunken "I love you's" count?
Girl: Do drunken "go aways" count?
BB: A really good friend of mine has been seeing this girl for three months, and last night he got trashed and dropped the L bomb on her, but now he's saying it doesn't count because he was drunk.
Girl: I think it's probably what he wanted to say, because booze brings out what we want to say but are usually too scared to say.

There it is again. Once something gets dropped into the conversation that is not useful, it is glossed over for something that IS useful. Here's a great example from Cajun, as seen on The Keys to the VIP.

Cajun: I like you. You can be my new little sister.
Obstacle: That's kinda creepy!
Cajun: We can climb trees and drink koolaid and stuff!
Target: YAY! (hugs Cajun)

So much happens when you ignore those threads that girls bring up. It avoids wasting time, it avoids unattractive topics, it shows non reactiveness and social intuition, but what I LOVE about it is the sub communication. "I am leading this interaction. We are talking about what I want to talk about. I am dominating your frame."

Just because I like you guys, I'm gonna throw in one more that came up during The Don's most recent NYC bootcamp with Kisser and Cajun.

BB: I've got to go back to my friends. Put your number in my phone..
Girl: I want to, but I can't. I've got a boyfriend.
BB: Sorry, I got distracted for a second and didn't hear the stupid shit you were saying. Put your number in my phone and I'll call you to hang out next week.
Girl: Okay!

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